Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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