First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
