um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
