I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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