Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
