apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize