Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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