The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
