# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
