how can u be prego again
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
