I would go down on you faster than GM stock
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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