Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
