I could have mohawked her pubes.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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