I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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