She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize