It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
