she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
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