Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
