Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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