just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
