wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize