my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
