oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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