I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
