We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Randomize
