You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
