We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
