so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
it hurts more in the daytime
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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