I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
