i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize