There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Randomize
