I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
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