just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
