i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
