Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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