Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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