if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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