you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize