Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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