He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize