That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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