he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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