Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
