I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
