God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
it was like eating out sand paper
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????