Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
