I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize