We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize