I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
