i just google imaged poop.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Randomize
